As much as I wanted a girlfriend, I need to reflect upon myself, on what's the motive behind these desperations, and am I really ready?
The short answer is: No, I'm not ready, and my motives are not clear.
First of all, at this phase of my life, I encountered severe loneliness, probably due to the fact that I'm alone most of the time.
Wanting a partner due to loneliness is not the best reason. In fact, I should not look for a partner based only on the need for companionship
Secondly, no I'm not ready. Emotionally, I'm volatile, just like my dad. I'm just like my parents. So, every time I see my parents quarrel, I wonder if I'll end up like them in the future, pondering if I'm worth having a wife, as I will not be able to handle her delicate heart.
So, how do you cure loneliness?
Honestly, I don't know. But this is part and parcel of life
I need to learn how to feel ok when I'm alone
I watched movies, travelled, read books etc.
Anything to fill up my time
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