It's my second day at the uni, as an international student. I feel very tired to socialise. I understand that no friendship will last forever, everything is very temporal, I can't escape it. I may be seem to be absolutely friendly to one another today, but the next few months we probably will forget each other. What a terrible thing to do. I know I am anti-social. But all glory to God, God made me able to socialize better.
I feel super tired to meet new people. Last year I admit that I have a lot of acquaintance, but no close friends to confide at all. I kept most of the things to myself. From what I learn from the world, having some close friends are the best thing ever. But I have none, none at all. I'd rather be alone than to be with the wrong people. Usually, I need 3 months to be totally adapted to a new environment. I just so afraid of people. It's just like the USA, I can't ask for more, but God blessed me with a group of friends. Although wavelength totally different but it's ok since it's only 5 months experience. I understand that probably my relationship with my host parents will be different. Last time I went in as an exchange student, with all the pretense. Now, I will visit them as a guest, my true ugly self. Lat time we are very close, but that can be dangerous as it can make an unrealistic expectations for both parties, which could ruin our next meeting. I will go in fresh, a new, to make friends once again.
No matter what, thank God I'm here! I am content with it, yes! Anything else, it's bonus. I don't mind, but I will do my best, and give God all the glory
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