Tired of socialising

It's my second day at the uni, as an international student. I feel very tired to socialise. I understand that no friendship will last forever, everything is very temporal, I can't escape it. I may be seem to be absolutely friendly to one another today, but the next few months we probably will forget each other. What a terrible thing to do. I know I am anti-social. But all glory to God, God made me able to socialize better.

I feel super tired to meet new people. Last year I admit that I have a lot of acquaintance, but no close friends to confide at all. I kept most of the things to myself. From what I learn from the world, having some close friends are the best thing ever. But I have none, none at all. I'd rather be alone than to be with the wrong people. Usually, I need 3 months to be totally adapted to a new environment. I just so afraid of people. It's just like the USA, I can't ask for more, but God blessed me with a group of friends. Although wavelength totally different but it's ok since it's only 5 months experience. I understand that probably my relationship with my host parents will be different. Last time I went in as an exchange student, with all the pretense. Now, I will visit them as a guest, my true ugly self. Lat time we are very close, but that can be dangerous as it can make an unrealistic expectations for both parties, which could ruin our next meeting. I will go in fresh, a new, to make friends once again.

No matter what, thank God I'm here! I am content with it, yes! Anything else, it's bonus. I don't mind, but I will do my best, and give God all the glory

Crazy over money

I'm now overseas, ready for undergraduate studies. My budget is pretty tight. Now all I think about is how to get money.
This blog is becoming more pressurized since AdSense helped me to earn less than a dollar (It's true!). But I don't want to write blogs just for money, it's the passion that matters.

I shouldn't be worry about money. Working part-time is never my thing though, where can I find the courage? dude I am such a wannabe money earner.

Well, God will always provide, I have to trust in him and let him guide my ways. Commit everything unto the Lord and he will take good care of it.

chatting with your crush

yes, this is what I felt

Different story

I am concerned ( a much better word than worry but still pretty much the same thing, which is not a  good thing,, worry is sin btw) about life in UK. I am not supposed to be concerned, but human nature, the flesh, what to do. Anyway, now i came to understand that God handled all my things when in UNMC and I didn't think much before I came to UNMC. Probably partly bcoz I was preoccupied with readjustment from USA that moment.

Now, in a week I'll be off to UK, the new uni experience posed a few concerns which I never thought of to be preoccupied with.

1. Christian fellowship group
2. Group of good friends
3. Church to go to

Lord, I humbly present this requests and allow u to handle all these matters. For u said that your yoke is light, and we are to cast everything into your loving hands. Thank you Jesus and I am trully sorry for what I've done which broke your heart. You took all the punishment for sin, so that I can live. I can only live for you.

I found it hard to fight against the flesh. It's a sinful nature, and it wants to do sinful things. It's only by the Holy Spirit, with Jesus living in me that I can be victorious. Yet, time and time again, I fell into temptation. What should I do? Human determination alone is never enough, in fact barely enough. It is only through Christ that we can do all things, for his glory and purpose.

change

Seriously, i really wanted to change myself, I wanted my life to be without regrets, and without any confrontational situation with anyone. I really wanted to make peace with every single person. But it's not possible, nobody can please everyone.

I noticed a big flaw in my life. I can easily allow the past hurts, failures to affect me every now and then. Since life is all about memory, why can't I just forget about it?

I think I should focus more on God's miracles on me. Yet, sometimes I do hate myself for my personality which I am trying my best to change for the better. However, the damaged is done. What I've done will be bringing the effect to the future. But in the end, bitter sweet memory makes a life beautiful. It's not what I face, which how I deal with it, that's character.

God is teaching me not to live but what I feel, but by the word of God

Random cliche Quotes

#1. beautiful and bitter memories make a life complete

#2. Let go of the past, so you can face the future

#3. Life is all about memories, choose wisely what you want to remember

#4. You can never be perfect

#5. The more you know about a person, the shittier it gets. Either you will become better friends or less.

#6. Pretty girls are everywhere, character counts the most.

#7. 99% imperfection and 1% perfection. A 100% perfect thing is born out of 100 imperfections

#8. Values in life is important. Only a few can stay on it for long