Stressed up

Within a span of a few months, I am expected to:

- Have a close group of friends in a new environment

- Be established in a new church

- Have a stable life partner

- Be a fully professional person, with separate professional and personal life, blossoming in each area. 

I know I will go through depression very soon.

I can't really complain about this because everyone goes through it. If I do make a big fuss about it, I am attracting attention only, which is not ideal. Can't I just complain for once and let it all out? It felt better. I want someone to tell me that it is ok to be lonely. It is ok to have no one. It is ok to have no friends. It is ok to be scared. This society makes me want to choke myself to the point of death, figuratively.

I am stuck in UK whilst my friends are blossoming back in Malaysia.

I don't know what to feel. I don't know how to feel.